Sunday, 12 June 2016

An Interview with A Closet Wota



Q:  I’m glad you finally let me ask you some questions about your wota identity and about being in 48Group fandom.
W:  Wait, I’m not even sure if I’m a wota or not-
Q:   Den-
W:  BUT I am in 48Group fandom recently. So maybe I can answer some of your questions.
Q:  Alright, then. You never really want to openly talk about it before, so it surprised me that you actually said okay when I asked you for an..uh..interview.
W:  Well… I don’t mind. You don’t know me, you don’t even know my name. You found me from-
Q:   From a Twitter account. Basically you’re just a username for me.
W:  That’s fine. I just don’t get it. Why do you want to know about wota and 48Group fandom?
Q:   I’m curious.
W:  Why me?
Q:   Because I want.
W:  Are you wota yourself?
Q:   No, and excuse me, it should be me asking you questions.
W:  O-okay.
Q:   So, tell me. How could you be in 48Group fandom?
W:  It’s a very long story actually.
Q:  I actually read your blog. You wrote some notes about AKB48 and their sister groups on your blog. I want you to confirm several things.
W:  Alright.
Q:   You started this whole thing because of boredom.
W:  Exactly. In early 2015 I was very bored and unmotivated. I got excellent years in 2013 and 2014, and 2015 scared me. It’s like I had to go back to earth and face the reality after I borrowed heaven and lived my dreams.
Q:   Long story short, you made a list – oh wait, no – a project to keep you motivated.
W:  HowNotToBeBored project. I even put a hashtag for it. I wrote down lists about new things I wanted to try and do.
Q:   And watching JKT48 performance in theatre was on the list.
W:  Yes. It’s something I’ve never done before.
Q:   But why watching JKT48?
W:  I’ve ever watched a talkshow about them on tv. There were many things I didn’t understand from this idol group. They talked about handshake event – like really? You had an event for handshake? And their fans, oh.. their fans are crazy! There was a fan who spent Rp10 millions for her favourite member’s memento. Yeah, it was for charity event, but still… It’s interesting for me. I wanted to know more about JKT48. I wondered what’s so special about them. Their concept of idols you can meet is unique. So I started where it began: in theatre.
Q:   When was the first time you watched them?
W:  You said you read my blog. You should’ve known.
Q:   Maybe I skip that part. Or I forget. When was it again?
W:  January 2015. That was the first. And I thought that would be the last.
Q:   I see.
W:  At that time I watched Team J, but their popular members like Melody and Veranda didn’t perform. So I went there again only to see them.
Q:   And then?
W:  After I watched them I asked myself, “Why don’t I watch Team K3?”
Q:   Ah, your favourite team!
W:  They were not my favourite at that moment. But yeah, I started to like them more than I like the more famous Team J.
Q:   “Team J are full of blinding stars but Team K3 are modest with their comforting dim light.” That’s what you said on your blog.
W:  That’s what I said.
Q:   So you frequently watched JKT48 after you found your favourite team?
W:  Not really. Maybe once in a month or two months? JKT48 have regular performance about 8 times a week, you know.
Q:   But the turning point was in April, when you watched Bokutachi wa Tatakawanai MV.
W:  Yes, it was from AKB48.
Q:   You were so amazed with the short MV that you wrote a note on your blog about it.
W:  Yes.
Q:   You even said that the feeling was like ‘love at the first sight’. Really? I think it’s too much. You’re exaggerating.
W:  That’s how I felt. I don’t know. I really like the song and the MV is amazing. The members looked super cool with the black seifuku. And they looked adorable with white angel-like seifuku.
Q:   What’s seifuku?
W:  It’s uniform. Or costume, I think.
Q:   I see. I actually watched the MV – several times even – but I don’t get you. Please don’t feel offended, but I don’t think it’s that cool.
W:  Well I don’t blame you. Some of my friends were not impressed, too.
Q:   Tell me again why you said it’s like ‘love at the first sight’?
W: You see, I always need time to like something. Anything. Bokutachi wa Tatakawanai was the exception. It’s easy and effortless for me to like them, right at that very moment.
Q:   Why? Because your favourite member was there?
W:  No. I barely knew anyone in that MV the first time I watched it.
Q:   So?
W:  Maybe because deep down I want to be like them.
Q:   Excuse me?
W:  I wish that I could be like a cool kid, because the cool kids, they seem to fit in-
Q:  You’re singing a song right now. Echosmith, right?
W: Yeah, sorry. But the point it, they looked cool to me. They looked vulnerable in white seifuku, but in black seifuku, they fight. They can protect themselves. They stand against the enemy. Later I understand the lyrics and it’s actually about world peace or something. Bokutachi wa Tatakawanai means We Don’t Fight. Which is funny, isn’t it? They fight all the time in the MV!
Q:   If that’s what you interpreted about the MV… So, because of this MV you started to like AKB48. You switched from JKT48 to AKB48.
W:  Exactly. Then I’m here where I’m now. It’s not only AKB48, but I also started to know about SKE48, HKT48, NMB48; basically 48Group.
Q:   I wonder if you watched MV other than Bokutachi wa Tatakawanai, would you like AKB48 then?
W:  I don’t know. Maybe not. You know, Bokutachi wa Tatakawanai is not the first AKB48’s MV I watched. The first was Heavy Rotation, long before I started HowNotToBeBored project. I watched it simply because of all the fuss about the MV. I was not a fan back then.
Q:   What did you think about Heavy Rotation MV?
W:  The MV was absurd for me. They exploited the girls. I swear I thought I wouldn’t be a fan of them. But then I watched Bokutachi wa Tatakawanai and it changed my perception about AKB48.
Q:   How-
W:  Uhmm..no. It’s not merely about Bokutachi wa Tatakawanai. It was only the start. You see, because of the MV, I was interested to know more about AKB48. I began watching their concerts, documentaries, dramas, and variety shows. That’s how I changed my perception.
Q:   Please explain more.
W:  I learned about their hard work, their dreams, their passion. They are young girls who are living their dreams.
Q:   You sound like some motivator I know.
W:  And oh, their songs! Some have nice lyrics that I can relate. There are songs that I listen to when I’m down. I feel better after I listen to them.
Q:   Like?
W: Like Shoujotachi yo, First Rabbit, Shiroi Shirt, 365 Nichi no Kamihikoiki, Shonichi, Mae Shika Mukanee, Himawari-
Q:   Okay, I got it. So you changed your mind about AKB48 or 48Group in general. From absurd and exploited girls to passionate and hardworking girls trying to reach their dreams?
W:  And funny, too. They’re really funny. YOU SHOULD WATCH AKBINGO. It’s very entertaining. I enjoy it very much. They’re also not only about beautiful face – you’ll surprise that not all of them are that pretty actually – but they really have talent OR trying to figure out their own talent. I know some members who are smart, like-
Q:   I see. You really like them.
W:  I do.
Q:   Then why don’t you openly say that you’re a wota?
W:  Like I told you before, I’m not even sure if I’m a wota.
Q:   You watched their performance in theatre.
W:  Yeah, JKT48’s.
Q:   You watched their concerts on DVDs, documentaries, and variety shows.
W:  Yes.
Q:   You watched their live concert?
W:  Yep. More than once.
Q:   You attended handshake event?
W:  Yes. JKT48’s-
Q:   You took a group pic with members?
W:  Yes, with JKT48 members in an event.
Q:   You bought their souvenirs and CDs/DVDs? You have lightstick?
W:  Y-yes.
Q:   You voted for general election? What’s that? Sousenkyo?
W:  Yes, though I didn’t vote many-
Q:   You have their songs on your iPod?
W:  Yes.
Q:   You read their fanfics?
W:  Why- but yes.
Q:   You have favourite member? What do you call it? Oshi?
W:  Yes.
Q:   You do furicopy during Himawari and clap your hand for Kokoro no Placard?
W:  It’s not relevant, but yes. Wait, you know too much. WHO ARE YOU?
Q:   You want to learn Japanese because of them?
W:  I think so.
Q:   You even want to go to Japan only to see their theatre in Akihabara and in Sunshine Sakae.
W:  Yes. H-how do you know?
Q:   I read your blog. Admit it, you’re a wota.
W:  No.
Q:   You’re a wota.
W:  Okay.. I guess I’m a wota.
Q:   I don’t know why it took forever for you to admit that you’re a wota.
W:  Because most wota have  negative image?
Q:   What do you mean?
W:  You see, when you say wota, you’d picture a nerd that devoted themselves in idoling. I read somewhere that some wota go to the extent that they sell their property to vote for their oshi in sousenkyo. I’m not like that. I still keep my sanity.
Q:   That’s extreme wota. You’re ordinary wota.
W:  Except that I’m not ordinary wota…
Q:   I don’t get it.
W:  I’m too old to be a wota. Almost all older wota I know are male. Female wota are few, let alone the older one. That’s what I notice when I watch JKT48 at theatre. I don’t think I belong to this fandom.
Q:   Because of your age?
W:  Because of my age. It seems wrong.
Q:   Why do you think so?
W:  People my age are supposed to live a settled life, not playing around watching some teenagers dancing and singing.
Q:   You sound bitter.
W:  Do I?
Q:   So, you feel the contradiction about a life you think you should live as an adult with what you’re actually doing?
W:  Maybe. It’s more like guilty pleasure for me.
Q:   But you see, I know that most wota in Japan are actually older than you-
W:  Yes, but it’s in Japan where idoling is a part of their culture. And I told you, all of them are male.
Q:   Is that all? Your age makes you feel insecure about being wota?
W:  There’s also other thing I want to share to you.
Q:   Go on.
W:  I told you that AKB48 members are funny, talented, and smart – that they’re not only show off their physical beauty, right?
Q:   Yes, and then?
W:  But for people outside of this fandom, they don’t see such qualities in them. People still relate them with gravure, summer style MV with bikinis, and exploitation of young girls.
Q:   I noted that you said exploitation twice. Do you think they’re exploited?
W:  I think we have to see the background of idoling in Japan. As far as I know, gravure is completely normal in Japan. Bikini is perfectly fine I guess? Some of their MVs are on the beach. And about the exploitation, I can’t really answer it.
Q:   Try to answer it. Remember that you’re an anonymous here.
W:  As long as the girls do not feel exploited, as long as they WANT it, it’s not exploitation. I think. But no, it’s still exploitation… I don’t know really. I can’t tell. And remember that culture plays big role here. We could have different views on what’s good or bad.
Q:   So their image affects how you feel about them?
W:  It’s not about how I feel. It’s about how I express my feeling.
Q:   You’re complicated.
W:  Maybe.
Q:   That’s why you’re a closet wota.
W:  More like, I don’t want everyone knows. I choose whom I want to open up to.
Q:   Why?
W:  Because people will judge.
Q:   You’re not being yourself. Don’t you think it’s tiring?
W:  Say I tell my colleagues that I’m a wota, then what? It will give them a reason to tease me. It will make me uncomfortable and uneasy.
Q:   You think too much.
W:  And maybe because I know that it doesn’t feel right. I should’ve lived an adult life. I’m an ISTJ, by the way.
Q:   What does that even mean?
W:  Forget it. That’s why I admire people who can express their feelings. You see, like Sashihara Rino and Fukushi Nao. They were wota and proud of their wota-ness. Now they’re idol in AKB48 Group. I have friends who aren’t afraid to show that they like AKB48. As much as I hate to admit, I envy them actually.
Q:   So, who knows that you’re a wota?
W:  My best friends know, and friends on Twitter.. I think they know. I tweet quite a lot about AKB48.
Q:   What about your family?
W:  I think my siblings know I have interest in JKT48. I sing their songs when we had karaoke. But I never really talked about them. What my family know is that I’m a fan of The Corrs haha! It’s true by the way.
Q:   It’s been more than a year since the first time you watched JKT48 in theatre.
W:  Yeah.. I thought it was just a phase.
Q:   Do you still watch their performance?
W:  Yes, the last time I watched was two weeks ago.
Q:   When will you graduate from this fandom?
W:  I don’t know. The thing about 48Group is that they keep changing. They’re very dynamic and fresh. They always have newer generations to replace graduate members. They always have new projects, new variety shows. But I’m happy, really. Remember when I told you that I was bored and unmotivated last year? After I knew AKB48, I think.. I have something to look forward to. It’s either their new albums, new variety shows, sousenkyo result, updated fanfics.. I have so many things to look forward to in this fandom. I hope I don’t sound pathetic.
Q:   No, you don’t. It’s enough for today. Thank you for sharing. I appreciate it.
W:  I’m happy to share this with someone. I never really have this conversation with anyone before.
Q:   Alright, then. Talk to you later.
W:  Talk to you later.

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