For you who read The Naked Traveler by Trinity, you must know that very challenging question as the title of this note. Trinity asked that question to motivate herself travelling around the world. For me, that first time is not merely about going to new places.
Last Thursday, out of nowhere, I woke up with that question stapled in my head. I wanted to do something first that day. The whole day I kept thinking and when I found the answer, I couldn’t wait until time to go home from work.
It was 4 pm when I practically flew from my cubicle in office. I grabbed my bag, combed my hair, and dressed up briefly before I went to Setiabudi One. That place would witness one of my first-time projects:
Watching. Movie. Alone. By. Myself.
I give the pause effect to bring more dramatic impression.
Yes, I want to watch movie by myself. I never do that before. Of course I’ve ever watched movies alone in my room, but this is different. I want to watch it alone in theater. So, it’s kinda big deal for me.
I’ve ever had karaoke alone, I’ve passed surgery by myself, I’ve gone to many places out of Java with nobody but me, but really, watching movie alone in theater is new for me. It needs courage since I’m so used to watch it with friends. It’s the awkwardness that I should fight.
I came to 21 Setiabudi One twenty minutes early before the movie started. I’ve decided to watch 'The Three Musketeers'. I checked the website before so I knew what movie to choose. I groggily went closer to the ticket booth, and a lady with a friendly smile asked how many ticket I’d buy.
“One ticket, please,” I felt a glump in my throat when I said that. The ticket booth lady gave me the pity look – or so I thought – before giving me a ticket.
I felt like a person with no friends. In fact, my best friend was out of town that day.
I felt like a person with no lover. In fact, I just haven’t found him yet.
Well... enough for the mellow drama.
Moreover, it’s me who insisted to feel the glorious experience of watching movie alone for the first time, remember?
Since the movie hasn’t started yet, I sat in a sofa and pretended busy with my phone. My peripheral vision found many couples here and there. I kept looking at my phone as if it looked me back. I was kinda wish my phone had Siri on it.
After centuries, finally Studio 1 has opened. I walked slowly, head up, chin up, nodded to the ticket ripper. As I entered my first step to studio, hundreds flash greeted me and paparazzi adored my braveness to watch movie alone. A little girl from nowhere came out, asked my autograph. I smiled and waved as if I won one of Oscar Award.
Yeah, you know, that only happened on my mind.
The truth is, I entered Studio 1 in a flash, looked for my seat, sat, and hoped the light turn off soon so that nobody noticed that I was alone. In fact, nobody noticed.
The movie started and in the first ten minutes, I missed my friends so badly. I missed having whispering-convos during movie. I missed sharing laughing and giggling. I missed sharing popcorn...
The next ten minutes and so on, I felt more relax. I focused myself for being present like Jamie Cat Callan taught me in her book ‘Bonjour, Happiness.’ I enjoyed myself watching giant screen before my eyes. I lost in the story. I was amazed with air-ship war and I loved the wonderful costumes Orlando Bloom and Milla Jovovich wore. The cool thing in that movie was Athos’ voice that I considered sexy.
I smiled with myself when I found sweet scenes. At that moment I realized, I have been best friend for myself for entire movie. I didn’t let awkwardness win.
‘When was the last time you did something for the first time?’
Now I’m sure what answer I may give. After watching movie on Thursday, I let myself find another first-time project to do. That question challenge me everyday to think about doing something new, something the first. It makes me appreciate every new day comes in my life.
Oh, and who knows in one of those days I will meet my significant others for the first time?
No comments:
Post a Comment